the latest and greatest ...the pitfalls of marriage..or the prevention of
with today's statistics of 3 out of 4 marriages ending in divorce...one (being me) would think that it gives people pause before entering into a marriage..it would make one want to pause and really think about it so that when they make that step they are really and FULLY committed and into it..otherwise you become that 3 out of 4!
Some people think dating is harder because you are trying to impress and sell yourself or appear to be worthy of marriage while others are of the mindset of just being yourself either way....i have concluded DATING is indeed the easy part.....
when you are dating..your motivation is far different...you do things because you want to or hey you just dont do them at all
and you can walk away whenever you want with or without cause
but i dare you all to think for a moment of my theory...when you are married..you go in knowing the odds are stacked against you...you go in hoping to not become that 3 out of 4 but look at the stats..NO one is immune
people get married and let themselves go..you hear all the time...oh she was a dime...and then she got married...or he was all about his appearance before he got married
i think once you are married..that is when you up the sexy that is when you change it up a bit.,..you have to keep it spicy.,..,you are about to spend FOREVER with that one person and if that is not motivation enough to want to keep that persons eye i dont know what is
hit the gym harder..make sure your toes, brows, and hair are done...dont start dressing like the old lady
fellas..hit the gym harder...try new cologne...stay on top of your fashion and appearance ...FOREVER can be a long time and when it feels like a SAT test its not encouraging
i think the one thing that makes that 1 out of 4 couples last and make them IMMUNE and escape the ugly divorce club is that they are both COMMITTED
and when i say committed i dont mean oh they both are on board or they would never cheat
NO i mean they put their marriage first EVERYDAY
they put that PERSON first EVERYDAY
that person is their WORLD
that is a concept most dont understand but let me tell you when a man adores you and has you on a pedistal you can CLIMB any mountain and its the most AMAZING feeling in the world...
there is a difference between someone loving you and someone adoring you and you being their world
but the couples who last WORK everyday at their marriage...but its not work to them...acts of kindness and displays of love become second nature because the true joy for them comes in making that other person happy
it cant be 50%-50% it cant be one carrying all the weight
it cant be the woman always pushing and coming up with dates..and planning their path...that is a marriage destined to fall
and i will say YES there is a 1% breed of men out there who are the romantics in the marriage 1% and those men have stopped fighting the fight and decided they would rather live happy in and harmony with their mate versus the constant battle
those are the men that listen and they DO exist...1%
but in a successful marriage BOTH parties must work,,,one should never question where the other's loyalty or priorities lie
those couples have found harmony and work at maintaining it....when you are there....PRICELESS...because really who wants to live in turmoil over silly stuff
life is too short to spend it bickering
im a firm believer of you know the stats coming in..either you want to be here or you dont...,as adults we shouldnt have to beg and plead and barter with our mates in order to be happy...because who wants something you have had to beg for....
i look at many couples and everyone has issues but there are a few basics that go a long way....good communication, constant communication, different forms of communication
the underlying theme here is COMMUNICATION
sooo whether you are married or heading that way you need to think about what type of couple you want to be..the 3 out of 4 OR the 1 out of 4 that is working and working everyday but happy and loving every minute of it
dont give your sexy away because you are married..TURN IT UP....
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april janelle
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april janelle
