6 years ago ......

6 years ago almost to the hour my life changed forever

6 years ago at 6am ish a group of nurses flooded my room at Virginia Hospital Center and informed me

IT IS TIME (kinda like Lion King ...but but not really)


6 years ago the journey of growing a child within me

watching my body change and expand (there was a lot of expanding)

6 years ago today I learned just how strong a woman's body is

i learned you can endure a whole lot more in the name of love and babies

6 years ago my center shifted from all about me to all about someone else

i think until you are a parent you will never truly understand what being selfless and what sacrificial love is

it is SO very different from the love between a spouse or any other relationship

becoming a parent changes EVERYthing

6 years ago the months of anticipation and wondering ..girl or boy

wondering would the baby look like me or Ray

6 years ago finally i held the most beautiful baby, MY baby...... Jordan Lee Crump

Over the past 6 years Jord, Jordy, Jojo has changed my world in ways I never expected or could have ever anticipated

over the past 2,190 days she has made me proud to be HER Mom and so happy to be A Mom

for anyone who knows the journey to Jojo ...it did not come easy and so i really take the time to savor every moment and appreciate each day as a gift ...because it is

So today as I last minute called off of work to spend the day with my baby

and while it was not planned i openly embrace the ability to call in to work on short notice and turn

a moment like my child asking me to stay and celebrate her 6th birthday with her into an opportunity to make a lasting memory

because 6 years is special and i want her to know just how special she is TO ME

4 months later

Oh it's been awhile... like 4 months to be exact

Today I woke up just like any other morning and I checked the news on my phone...

i get the important political stuff but i also get the celeb fluffy stuff

so there was something that caught my eye

another celebrity divorce

and for some reason despite my two trips down that road

i always feel such a profound hurt when i see another couple going their separate ways

now before i sound too judgy, i am the first to recognize that sometimes there are reasons

and obstacles that may seem insurmountable or people feel pushed into a corner with no other recourse

i get that, i truly do

but i also think one of the lessons that God has allowed me to learn from my losses is just how fragile and how much work are required of relationships and marriages are the supreme relationship

its meant to be forever and transcend hurt feelings, seasonal change, loss, gain and everything in between

i think whenever i hear about a new divorce i mourn and hurt a little bit for the loss of my marriages

that is NOT to be confused with REGRET because I am where i am and who i am because of those losses

they have changed me to the core and changed my capacity and understanding of love and relationships

as a newlywed now i have a more refined understanding of fighting for and protecting my marriage

in the past i didnt recognize and have the tenacity and grit to dig in and fight on the days when you may not want to look at that person let alone share a word

now i plant seeds of forgiveness and understanding and compassion DAILY

its not just good enough to forgive once, you have to forgive over and over and over and over

AND OVER

and sure there may be days when that person gets ON YOUR NERVES (and boy does he)

but then i remember what a PEACH i can be and i realize that's balance and that's LOVE

so while the news came today of one couple calling it quits..


there was another couple  -LL Cool J and his wife Simone that celebrated 22 years

within the realm of celebrities and public figures, what is it that causes some to fail while others somehow someway still thrive and defy the statistics

What grounds some

what destroys others

so that was my thought of the day.....

a drink for one and a prayer for another