it's monday.....the start of a new week
a day that signifies a do over and a fresh start
today's topic admittedly was solicited BUT it was poignant and allowed me to do some introspective thinking
"what have you gained and what have you lost by taking a risk"?
or "what can you gain or lose by taking a risk"
we all live our lives through our own soundtracks and ideals
some people prefer a slow steady tempo while others like to explore the shuffle option on the play deck
life can be full of beautiful surprises ...but how is that best achieved...what is the formula
do you experience all life has to offer and all the beauty of love and smiles and laughter when you play it safe or do you have the most life altering and memorable moments by stepping outside your comfort zone and taking a chance...taking that leap of faith
i can say from personal experience and personal loss that it becomes very daunting and almost crippling to take a risks at times especially after being hurt
you want to recoil and stay in your safe little world
its hard to let go of the hurt and disappointment that you have experienced
you tell yourself things like NEVER AGAIN
and it's just not worth it
some may call this being smart
others would disagree and call you a COWARD
so here we go
and i may sound a bit hypocritical because im still a work in progress and i still struggle with holding back and not letting myself really soar and be unencumbered by my fears of failure or fears of repeated wrong choices
part of that is being human but part is choosing how you want to live the rest of your life
do you want to remind yourself everyday of what has not gone right
or do you want to look forward to what can be and what can be great
do you want to sail new seas and experience new heights or do you want to just cruise at a low altitude
when you are in the midst sometimes you can't see the sun breaking through because of all the dew but do you stand there and wait on the dew to past or do you keep walking forward and catch the sunrise
often times i jump head first into things and i know people say its not smart
i realize everyone has an opinion
did you think it out
are you sure
why dont you give it time
why dont you
why dont you
calculated is fine for some things
but for others i think if you are always sitting on the sidelines waiting for the "perfect" chance, the "perfect"moment you will spend your whole life waiting
i looked for the perfect relationship in the past...i know now perfection doesn't exist
its a state of mind
its a balance of all the right things and important things to you rolled up in one where they outweigh the not so perfect things
taking a leap of faith sounds so easy
but you have to have some elements present
you need trust and sometimes in order to have trust you need assurance
people make promises all the time
promises are broken all the time
so making that leap of faith requires the ability to jump in..all the way in...without holding back without holding on
how do you do that
i dont have that answer...still figuring it out myself
but i think it goes a little something like this
the past is the past
learn from it
but leave it there
dont let your past define you
let it teach you
let it make you stronger
let it show you what you want or dont want
let your past not follow you or loom around
your past is not your present and its not your future
all easier said than done
but how often and for how long will we punish ourselves for our past
how long will we live according to what happened 2, 3, 5, 10 years ago
i know im guilty of it
i know i need to change
i want to unpack and leave the heavy trunk behind and carry only the valuable lessons i need with me
life is worth living and living fully
having regrets
thats unhealthy and destructive
we can all list our regrets from now until Sunday
but does it solve anything
everything happens for a reason
timing is always when it is meant to happen not when we want it
do i have regrets...i have some "i wish i'd made a better choice or a different choice"
but even out of my most undesirable choices...there generally was a beautiful surprise....................
